Observance of "iddat" by widows

Iddat is the mandatory waiting period to be observed by widows or divorced Muslim women. The main reason for it is that by the end of four months and ten days, it is evident that the woman is not pregnant, and so she can then marry again. But over the years, some so-called experts have made it intolerable for women to observe the iddat.

Even though the original reason for iddat was to disallow the widow from marrying, she is now forbidden to talk to men who are not closely related to her (like her brothers, nephews, etc), those called "non-mehrams", men whom she can marry. Some fundamentalists have said it's a sin for her to talk to even her sister's husband or her son-in-law. 

What I don't understand is that even if she is past the child-bearing age, she's forced to remain single and confine herself indoors. In this day and age, a simple blood test can determine if a woman is pregnant or not, so why should even a young widow have to undergo the torture? 

 Imam Bukhari relates the story of a woman whose husband was killed in a battle just two days before she gave birth. After forty days, she announced that she was ready to marry. Immediately there was an uproar from her relatives, so she travelled to Madina to ask the Holy Prophet whether she could marry or wait for four months and ten days. "There is no need for you to observe iddat", she was told. This also proves that a woman could travel during the iddat period, but our "experts" prefer to have her locked up.    

"Celebrating" the sacred month of Muharram

Western writers know very little about Islam, so they say that Shia Muslims celebrate Muharram when in fact it is not something to celebrate about. The proper word would be "mourn". As I've said before, I have nothing against Shias (or even Hindus and other no-Muslims), but I do think that the way they observe this month is not quite right. Their chest-beating and self-flagellation, for instance, is incomprehensible, as well as their mourning processions that shut down entire cities.

There was a time, for instance, when all female employees (even Sunnis) of Pakistan TV had to wear black and cover their heads in the first ten days of Muharram, acting as if they'd just embraced Shiaism. Most Shias used to believe that the surest way to get to heaven was to do something that would hurt Sunni Muslims (I know this from personal experience, a Shia government officer deliberately got my salt factory shut down in the sacred month).

Shias of course believe that the ancestors of today's Sunnis killed Hussain, while I used to know many Sunnis who said that it was the ancestors of Shias who did it. I wish they would stop indulging in such fights and get united. I've known many Shias who act like normal human beings even in the first ten days of this month, they don't get upset when a Sunni man says "Assalam Alaikum" to them, but of course there aren't many of them. Most of them are busy mourning.

  

The month of mourning and Shiaism

 It's the sacred month of Muharram (the month of mourning) and I have yet to understand why some Muslims indulge in self-flagellation and inconveniencing others by taking out processions. 

I admire the Iranian leadership for taking a stand against Israel and supporting the Palestinians. But I can't help wondering why they cannot put a stop to all the senseless activities of Shias (and some Sunnis as well). In Pakistan, virtually all economic activity comes to an end during the first ten days. Goods are stranded at the ports, payment for delays have to be made in dollars and daily wage workers have to go without earning anything. 

I once had a skilled supervisor whom I asked to come to work on the tenth of Muharram for an hour or so. He was shocked. According to him, anyone who works on that day is doomed to burn in hell. 

I have read about the origins of Shiaism and know what happened for Muslims to split into two major groups. There are only three or four countries where Shias are in the majority. In Saudi Arabia, which has many Shias living in the oil-rich eastern part of the country, the tenth of Muharram is not observed at all. In Azerbaijan, a Shiaite country, the day is observed in the privacy of homes and mosques, not on the roads. In Malaysia and Indonesia, virtually no one has heard about Shiaism. 

I don't object to anyone mourning and beating their chests, but at least they should confine their mourning to their mosques or localities. In Pakistan the main roads of all the cities are blocked by the mourners, as a result of which persons suffering heart attacks cannot be taken to hospitals.

After watching Indian film "Maharaj", I'm glad my remote ancestor converted to Islam

One of the major advantages of living in the twenty first century is that you can watch foreign movies on Netflix. Indian films have been banned in Pakistan for many decades now, so I am able to watch such movies on my laptop. I also watch American movies (much more than the Indian ones).

Recently I came across the movie "Maharaj". After watching it, I consider myself lucky that my remote ancestor Nathu Lal or Nathu Ram became a Muslim some three hundred years ago in Bhavnagar, India. As the film is about a Hindu sub-sect in Gujrat (the Indian state where I was born), it was a shock to know about a disgusting custom among its followers. The movie is based on a true event (a case in the Bombay High Court) that occurred about 150 years ago.

In this sub-sect, it was common for girls and women to have sex with the leader (Maharaj) before they were married. Everyone in the sect (men as well as women) considered it perfectly normal and apparently most of the women in the community had been abused by their chief before their marriage. Whatever the Maharaj said was considered to be the law, they thought he was God in human form. It took a very brave man to challenge and get the community to abandon this custom. The movie is in chaste Hindi (which I find difficult to understand) but the subtitles make it easy for the viewer.

Dawoodi Bohras: a brainwashed community

I don't know how many Shia sub-sects there are in the world. I know of at least four that exist in Pakistan. Those who call themselves the Dawoodi Bohras are perhaps the most brainwashed, even more so than the Sunni Barelvis.

The head of the Dawoodi Bohras is regarded as someone very holy and deserving of worship by his followers. I have seen some of them kissing the tyres of his cars. He lives mostly in India, but every year, he spends the first ten days of the sacred month of Muharram in a foreign city, where his followers are numerous. This year he has come to Karachi and there is an influx of 80,000 Dawoodi Bohras from all over the world. Twenty thousand of them have come from India alone.

This man compels his followers to practice female circumcision and other abhorrent practices. For a good sum of money, he gives a scented piece of paper (with a written recommendation that the bearer be allowed to enter Paradise). This paper has to be placed inside the shroud of a dead Bohra so he can immediately go to Heaven. Some of his followers even purchase such papers years before their deaths. He's also ordered his followers to use old-fashioned Indian WCs instead of the normal English commode for peeing and pooping. I was once in a hospital where a Bohra was dying. His relatives went on waving their spiritual leader's portrait near his face for hours until the man breathed his last.

I can't understand why educated Bohras tolerate him. Years ago, the father of a friend of mine and six or seven of his relatives rebelled against him. They were immediately expelled from the community and were not allowed to bury their loved ones in the Bohra cemetery in Karachi. They could not marry anyone in the community, even those who were their close relatives.

Verily this kind of brainwashing is unique.

Why do religious Muslims hate women?

In 2005 I went to Saudi Arabia for performing Haj with my wife and daughter. We wanted to see the huge cemetery outside Madina where some Muslims had been killed in the early days of Islam, But the Pakistani bus driver prevented my wife and daughter from going there, as Islam didn't allow it. At the gate of the cemetery was a huge signboard with a saying from the Prophet (pbuh) according to which women are allowed to visit graveyards. I went back to the Pakistani bus driver and told him about it. His response was that it was not true and that Arabs don't know the real Islam.

An imam of a mosque in DHA said the other day that women are not allowed to pray in mosques as it is against the teachings of Islam. Apparently he's never been to Saudi Arabia, where women pray in practically every mosque.

I have heard from other deeply religious men that women are responsible for all the world's problems, like floods, earthquakes and other natural disasters. But I can't understand how they have reached such conclusions. Such people are convinced that women should not be allowed to go out of their houses (unless it's absolutely necessary, like rushing to a hospital for delivery of their babies). Until recently, Saudi scholars were propagating that those women driving cars would suffer from all kinds of diseases, including cancer. Which is why women were not allowed to drive cars until recently.

The question remains: why do they hate women so much? 

Shocking: Hindus allowed to visit holy sites in Madina

In a shocking development, some Indian ministers were invited by the Saudi government to visit holy places in Saudi Arabia. Until now, non-Muslims were not allowed to visit Makkah and Madina, the two holy cities in the kingdom. In fact, if a non-Muslim was caught in these two cities, he would be executed. This at least was the common belief.

But the three ministers who were allowed to go inside the sacred mosque and two other holy places are fervent idol worshipers. I can't believe that the Saudis are so stupid, they should have done proper research before allowing them inside the holy city. Muslims throughout the world would be justified to protest, but now that Israel is the favored partner of the Arabs, I won't be surprised if Jews are also allowed to roam freely in the holy land. Of course, that wouldn't be as bad as allowing Indian non-Muslims, as Jews are closer to Muslims than Hindus.

One must admit that the Indians have really succeeded in diplomacy. Pakistanis, on the other hand, don't have the art of cultivating friends. Our governments have always been dominated by greedy people. Incidentally, this is why Pakistan is virtually a failed state.

Islamic banking

I've never deposited my hard-earned savings in interest-bearing bank accounts, even though I'm not deeply religious. It was because everyone thought something dreadful would happen if I earned interest money. I've studied this subject in detail and I'm convinced that interest earned from banks is not forbidden. However, I will not go into that now.

 Recently I went to three so-called Islamic banks to find out how they operate. I was shocked at what I discovered. They told me that the rate of "profit" (a euphemism for interest) was much greater for higher amounts. A ten-million rupee deposit would get up to seventeen percent, while a million rupee deposit would get less than eight percent. And if I borrowed money from them, I would have to pay thirty one percent. I can't imagine anything more un-Islamic than this whole-sale looting.

Conventional banks offer twenty percent interest, whatever the amount. I heard one Islamic scholar say that it would be better to earn interest and give it to the poor. This is what one of my rich uncles used to do.

In my opinion, the whole Islamic banking thing is a scam to cheat gullible Muslims. But of course Pakistani Muslims will fall for it wholesale.  

Polygamy is banned in UK but some Muslims have more than one wife

In most countries, a man can't have more than one wife. In Turkey, polygamy is banned. In Pakistan, if a man wants to take a second wife, he has to get written permission from his current wife, who has no choice but to agree, as she knows he will divorce her if she says no. 

Muslims living in the UK have found a way to practice polygamy without being arrested. They can't divorce their current wives because they would have to give her half their properties and incomes, without having full custody of their children. So they have an Islamic marriage in a mosque. The second wife doesn't object, she's already a British citizen and even if she has children without being legally married, the state cannot punish her. In fact, her children will also get UK citizenship.

During my recent vacation in England, a ten year old girl (Sarah) was killed, and her father (with his second wife called "partner") escaped to Pakistan. They are now back in the UK, facing trial for murder of the little girl. Her biological mother is Polish, and her father evidently didn't want to divorce her (for reasons cited above). So he married a British Pakistani woman without divorcing the first wife.  I can guess why he killed his daughter. He probably wanted her to go to Pakistan with him so she could be engaged to one of his nephews. I suspect that when she refused, he got enraged and beat her up. I hope he and his "partner" are sentenced to life imprisonment.

Why are Pakistani Muslims against birth control?

I can understand the illiterate Pakistani man wanting to have ten children at least. But I can't understand why even Pakistani graduates think that birth control is a heinous sin. There was a time when it was normal for Memons to have six to eight children (even though there was one in our neighborhood who had seventeen children from one wife). Memons of my age are satisfied with three, although there was one with nine kids, He looked so much like me that even his four year old daughter mistook me for her father. He died of heart disease before attaining the age of 50.

There was a Memon businessman I knew who once berated me for saying that Muslims should limit the number of children they have. Apart from Memons, other Pakistanis are continuing to produce at least six children if not more. One reason of course is that they want to keep their wives so busy they won't have time to look at other men. Perhaps they also believe that it will prevent them from spending more on clothes and make-up.

Ultimately, it's the mullah who is to blame for brainwashing Muslims into believing that birth control is a sin and those who limit the number of their children will burn in hell. 

The spirit of sacrifice is absent in today's Muslims

Every year Muslims throughout the world slaughter millions of goats, cows, camels and sheep to commemorate the festival of sacrifice known as Eid-al-Azha. There are rich people with plenty of black money who cheerfully pay more than ten million rupees for a well-fed cow or bull. Even middle-class Muslims who are living hand to mouth think it's their religious duty to spend forty to fifty thousand rupees on a small-sized goat or lamb and sacrifice the animal.

Not long ago almost all Muslims were very poor and could not afford to spend money on meat. Giving sacrificial meat to such people made sense. But today I've yet to meet a Muslim in Karachi who doesn't consume meat almost daily. What I find astonishing is that we give them the sacrificial meat. What we should do is to give the money we spend on animals to those very poor Muslims in the villages of Pakistan whose houses have been washed away and whose crops were destroyed in last year's floods. Then of course there are those who lost everything in earthquakes.

I know that our religious scholars will never agree to this, so I won't say much except that in Pakistani cities the animals are slaughtered on the streets, leaving their entrails and unwanted stuff to rot under the sun for many days. It also costs a lot to remove it, besides of course exposing the people to contracting diseases like malaria.

Our religion is in danger if we celebrate Holi and New Year!

Why do older Pakistani Muslims think that Islam is in grave danger if our youngsters enjoy themselves? A couple of days back, a female government official warned college and university officials in the country against celebrating the Holi festival in their premises. Earlier, in March, Jamat-e-Islami activists had disrupted Holi celebrations in Punjab University. 

This religious party has never been able to win more than five or six seats in general elections. Its activists apparently think it's a heinous sin for Pakistani Muslims to enjoy themselves by indulging in celebrating festivals like Holi and New Year.

There was a time when New Year parties were regularly held in Karachi's hotels and clubs. Jamat-e-Islami activists would disrupt these events by damaging vehicles parked outside such places (even private residences were not spared). In Karachi University, they used to beat up male and female students for talking to each other or sitting less than five feet apart.

One reason for its lack of success is its obsession with women. For five years it was in a coalition government in KP, but its main concern was to remove pictures of women and animals from textbooks. The day it comes to power in the country will be a bad day for us all.

Understanding cults: the Zikris

Those who can't understand why some people in Pakistan have become part of a cult that glorifies Imran Khan should study a little-known people (the Zikris). What started as a cult is now what its followers call an Islamic sect, but which is a totally different religion.

I first heard of the Zikris when I entered the salt trade in 1978. The coastal areas of Sindh and Baluchistan are home to many peoples, among them the Zikris (who also live in Iran and India). The estimated number of Zikris can't be more than two or three hundred thousand.

Around five hundred years ago, a man in the town of Jonpur (India) raped his own mother while heavily drunk. When he regained his senses and saw what he had done, he left for the holy land where he spent the next fifteen or sixteen years, praying and meditating all the time. He was persuaded to marry a girl from Jonpur who had arrived for the pilgrimage with some relatives from India. A couple of years later, his wife expressed a desire to go back to her home town to be with her ailing mother. When the two reached their home town he discovered that her mother was also his mother, and she was his own daughter. He then concluded that he was a prophet, apparently because prophets had to undergo much torture in the past. He retired to the mountains of Baluchistan and became famous as a holy man, His followers soon swelled. His grave is in Turbat (Baluchistan) where his followers gather every year on the twenty seventh of Ramzan to perform their own version of the Islamic pilgrimage known as Haj.

There are other differences in their beliefs, they don't fast in the holy month of Ramzan, but do so on the first nine days of Zilhij. They don't pray in the way Muslims do, they only recite what they call "Zikr". I once read that some Muslims in Chechnya also indulge in "Zikr". Maybe they're also Zikris. 

Mob justice

Pakistan is perhaps the only country where people kill others for indulging in what is called "blasphemy". This can mean anything that differs from the opinion of the majority or saying something against religious personalities. It's become so bad that I now refrain from talking about religion even with relatives.

During the recent past, there have been many instances where mobs have lynched alleged blasphemers. The governor of Punjab (Salman Taseer) was killed not for uttering anything controversial but saying that the blasphemy law needed to be amended. Sometimes the victims are either Christian, Hindu or Ahmedi who are killed because their killers want their properties. It's so easy to do so, just tell a mosque preacher that you've heard them saying something disparaging about Islam, and very soon a crowd of emotional people set houses on fire.

The other day a Pathan mulla was killed because he he said he loved Imran Khan more than anyone else. This was enough to arouse those near to him and he was beaten to death with sticks. This kind of thing is shameful and the perpetrators should be brought to justice, but I doubt that will ever happen. No judge would risk his life by acquitting someone accused of blasphemy. 

Holy days and nights

Last night was one which almost all Muslims (until recently) regarded as one of the holiest nights in the year. It was the night of the full moon in the month of Sha'aban. Some Muslims are fasting today (15 Sha'aban), perhaps to prepare for the month of fasting which begins in two weeks. 

I've often wondered why this particular night is always regarded with great reverence by Muslims who belong to the Barelvi sub-sect. Not long ago, all Memons were Barelvis, but now it appears that many of them have gone over to the other side (the Deobandi sub-sect). 

One year (I must've been about ten years old), I spent this entire holy night praying. My major concern in those days was not money, it was to get the highest marks in every exam. As a teenager, I used to wonder why people wasted so much time going to graveyards and throw rose petals on the graves of their relatives. Nowadays of course it's impossible to go to most cemeteries, and with petrol being so expensive, Memons at least have stopped going. But for those who don't live far from the graveyards, it's still a religious duty. 

I once read somewhere about an ancient tribe who used to celebrate this night (or maybe every full moon night) with singing and dancing. Perhaps later on they started praying and visiting graves on this night and this custom was adopted by Muslims. I know there is a day when Catholics visit graveyards (I once heard my Grade 5 school teacher telling her Catholic wards to behave themselves when they were there). 

Why are women's names not printed on wedding cards and in obituaries?

Way back in 1970, I received a wedding card from my Baloch contractor. The card had two names printed, both males. One was that of an uncle, the other of his nephew. I looked hard, but could not find the name of the brides. When I asked, I was told, "Among the Baloch, if a male outsider gets to know the name of any of their wives, mothers or daughters, it's considered a heinous sin. The outsider and the woman whose name he knows are frequently killed". I thanked Allah that I was not born among such people.

But now, this practice is almost universal, even among my relatives. I asked one of them and he said, "It's Arab culture". In the first place, Pakistanis are not Arabs, and in the second, if it's due to Arab culture, why are names of females found in the Holy Koran and the Hadith? Even obituaries of women don't state their names. Usually, the deceased woman is referred to as "wife of...." or "mother of.....".

I thought of something else. The name of the bride is stated as "daughter of....". What happens if the man has more than one daughter, as is usually the case? How will people know which daughter the wedding card is referring to? And again, what do they do when going abroad (for Haj, etc)? When applying for visas, do they simply write "daughter of ....." or "mother of....". 

This is the kind of thing that makes Muslims appear backward and illiterate, but Pakistanis simply don't understand this.

How do you define a "shaheed" (martyr)?

Until recently, there was no debate on what "shaheed" meant: a man who died while defending Islam (or an Islamic country). This of course happened during war time. But now the word can mean any number of things.

When a near relative died in an accident (a loaded container fell on his car), his father went to great lengths to convince me that his son had died a martyr. I wanted to ask him why it should matter, but I refrained. A "shaheed" is believed to get the highest honor in heaven, complete with the seventy two virgins. But then, why is a woman (Benazir Bhutto) called a "shaheed"? What will be her reward in the hereafter: seventy two virile young men? Just because she was shot dead by a militant (due to her own stupidity)? What about the hundreds of people who die in accidents every month? 

The other day a young engineering graduate was killed by looters when he refused to hand over his cell phone to them. I saw a moulvi on Twitter saying that the man was a martyr, and he advised anyone in a similar situation to resist with full force any armed bandit, as dying in this manner would make him a "shaheed". I wonder what he would do if he was being looted. 

Not only being killed by robbers can make a man a martyr, it now seems that all those who die in earthquakes and floods and other natural disasters are also "shaheeds". I won't be surprised if in future the word includes those who die in epidemics (like Covid). You never know with these mullahs, they can interpret religion any way they want. 

Not only Hindus, some Pakistani Muslims also believe in reincarnation!

In my apartment building lives a family that keeps dogs and cats as pets. I sometimes meet the lady when she walks with a couple of her dogs and we chat for a few minutes. The dogs are very friendly and are used to my petting. Most of my neighbors are terrified when they see a dog, so they can't understand how I can be so friendly with the dogs. The lady once told them, "If you are scared of dogs, they know it and react accordingly". 

One neighbor, a Muslim, said to me, "You must have been a dog in your previous life". I was surprised, as I thought only non-Muslims like Hindus believed in reincarnation. Of course I don't think it is possible, mainly because there is no scientific evidence to prove it. 

For instance, if a man is morally corrupt he will be re-born as a dog or any other animal. But how does a dog turn into a man? Does an animal know the difference between good and bad? What good deeds would a frog have to do to be reincarnated as a human?

I should explain why I'm not scared of dogs. When I was growing up, keeping dogs as pets was not frowned upon. No one came and told us that we would not be allowed to enter Paradise if we had dogs in our house. As the years went by and the fundamentalists became powerful, most people stopped keeping dogs as pets. Since we had dogs, cats and even birds (like peacocks) in our bungalow, I and my siblings grew up being very friendly with them. I don't pick up a stone to hit dogs, which most Pakistanis do. The other day, a stray dog walked along with me and my wife in our compound for forty minutes. When I mentioned this to my neighbors, they were alarmed. "You should have shooed him away", said an old lady. "Why didn't you shoot him?" said someone else. I'm surprised that such people exist in a posh locality like ours.

Myths about solar and lunar eclipses

When I was around five or six, we had a servant who used to say that solar and lunar eclipses happen when God punishes the sun and the moon for their sins. Even at that tender age, I asked him how it was possible for men to predict the exact time and date of an eclipse. How could men know what God was going to do and when? He had no answer.

There were many myths in those days about the eclipses. Women (especially pregnant women) were locked up. Women were told not to use knives for cutting food and not to operate sewing machines. I don't know what Hindu and Christian women did during the eclipse, but Muslim women were told to pray all the time during the duration of an eclipse. Having sex during an eclipse was supposed to result in children being born with cleft lips or with brain damage. Perhaps that explains why there are so many retarded Indians and Pakistanis.

Nowadays of course, people don't believe such things. Today there is a solar eclipse in the afternoon and a distant female relative of mine has invited women to attend a religious ceremony (in connection with Rabi-ul-Awal). I wonder if some women will use the eclipse as an excuse to stay away. 

Will there ever be peace between Shias and Sunnsi?

Pakistanis, by and large, are very tolerant of those who belong to other sects or religions. But occasionally, die-hard Sunnis suddenly go berserk and kill Shias, especially on their holy days. The other day, a Shia Chehlum procession in Sialkot was attacked, and many of them were seriously injured. Of course, communal riots undoubtedly occur in Shia-majority countries like Iran, but we never hear about them due to lack of press freedom in that country. But the question arises, why are Muslims so intolerant?

In Saudi Arabia, there was a time when Jews and Christians were living in peace with the Muslim majority. Today there are none. In fact, when an ancient church was discovered recently in that country, the authorities panicked and didn't allow reporters to write about it. Shias of course are present in large numbers in Saudi Arabia, which is why they've managed to survive so far, but not so long ago, Sunnis with Shia names like Hassan or Hussain or  Ali were not given tourist visas in that country (even Kuwait had a ban on Shia tourists). 

When Pakistan provided soldiers to Saudi Arabia, that country insisted that only Sunni soldiers would be allowed inside their country. It's mind-boggling, really, why there should be this much hatred. Despite Arab countries recognizing the Jewish state, they can't make peace with Iran. They don't realize that a divided Muslim ummah is not good, but I suppose it will take decades before there is peace between the two sects. If ever.